drawings from popular and reality television by Jenny Robins. Suggestions welcome - use hashtag

Sunday, December 22, 2013

Christmas in a Day

Have you seen the feature length Sainsbury's ad, christmas home video compilation that is Christmas in a Day?

You really should. It's on the youtube for free. It's, you know, totes emosh, and also witty and sarcastic and genuine and all the Christmassy.

I like the woman obsessed with her geese and the woman tweeting Simon Cowell at 1.30am in Christmas morning, obviously the girl who got the Barbie Graveyard, the woman who likes to edit boxing videos as a hobby, all the drunken carol singing, all the petty arguments.

I drew two of my favourite momentquotes for you:
As well as the girl crying because she thinks she's too naughty for a stocking and the girl who wants all her presents to be ipads, this girl's saddest of sad faces when she thinks she's not getting the Camera she wants for Christmas, but trying to be philosophical about it and see the true meaning of the season is so classic. Because this film if anything really shows that she's right, in both senses. It is all about the presents, and all the other things too. 

This gentleman doesn't even need any spiel to tell you how awesome he his, just look at him. 

Tuesday, December 3, 2013

Launching Real TV Wisdom Shop

So I know you have all been wondering how you could possibly acquire some Real TV Wisdom drawings for yourselves. 

Wonder Nenceforth.

For I have put some in an Etsy Shop. 

Not only can you order a print of ANY Real TV Wisdom drawing you like for an exclusive holiday rateness of only £8, you can also BUY original drawings, COMMISSION your own, and OF COURSE, buy Real TV Wisdom Christmas cards.



 



Tuesday, November 26, 2013

Christmas Card designs grand reveal

This is a special post, and some special Real TV Wisdom drawings. I've been scouring the land of digitally available video material on the theme of culinary Christmas for the past few weeks trying to find my favourite celebrity chef christmas soundbites (and expressions). The results are the below Christmas card designs which I will be sending out to a special list of people, and will also selling a limited number of packs in the soon to be launcehd REal TV Wisdom Shop. Exciting times isn't it?

If you think you should be one of the select people (you might be already) or if you're interested in buying a pack, feel free to pop me a comment, or an email, or shout really really loud (I might hear you).
Quote from Heston's Christmas Feast, originally aired 18.12.2009 on Channel 4. I really hope Heston does another one of these this year, where a group of celebrities sit in a souped up grotto and make soundbites about the magic of Christmas whilst intercut with scientific experiments and visits to the middle east. 

 From Jamie's Best Ever Christmas, aired 20.12.10 again on Channel 4. Poor Jamie, knowing that his best Christmas and best gravy are forever behind him now.
This is from Nigel Slater's 12 Tastes of Christmas from last year 14.12.12 on BBC One. It took me forever to draw that Christmas Jumper! I love Nigel, love his expressions and his suppers, although I do get him confused with that other posh one with the garden. 

From a way back, this is Nigella Express Season's Eatings 10.12.2007. I watched a LOT of Nigella Christmas clips, but this just summed it up for me, I'd like a little Nigella Christmas Fairy to say calming things, and innuendos to bring peace and tranquility to the holiday season. She's a bit like Attenborough to me, just a very calming televisual presence. I have to say I drew this and sent to the printers before the recent media interest in Nigella's personal life, which may give a somewhat different reading of the meaning of this card. To which I echo Nigella's no comment.

Looking forward to this years Seasonal Cookery Programming. 

Friday, October 4, 2013

Football special: Cristiano Ronaldo

The field of sport is ripe for the plundering for wisdom. Who could know more about hard work and the price of success than people that are paid ridiculous amounts of money so they can focus on nothing else? And Ronaldo's analysis could apply to so many undertakings - whether the Great British Bake Off tent (come on Ruby), the classroom (come on year 11), or of course the football pitch. Unless you have the bravery to push yourself and take risks to expand your knowledge, you will never develop the skills you need to succeed. Courage is not a guarantee of a multi million paycheck of course. 

Thursday, September 12, 2013

Kimberley

I almost didn't sketch this piece of Real TV Wisdom, for starters, the GBBO editors are OBSESSED with this soundbite, cos, you know, it sounds a bit rude, and Kimberley looks all sparkly and happy when she says it. So I already saw it two weeks ago and was actually a bit confused to see it in the actual episode this week. Also, the close up angle means you can't see the top of Kimberley's hair. And she was star baker like Ruby and it's not like a thing that I want to draw the star baker. 

But, obviously, i drew it anyway.  Because, you know, it sounds a bit rude, but is very wise. What truly governs our happiness more than our physical comfort, and satisfactory pie? 



Wednesday, September 4, 2013

Jeremy Kyle

So this was a best of Jeremy Kyle episode as a taster for the new series starting next week. We'd just seen a lovely couple of kids with a kid battle it out with their 'grandparents at war' from last year. Jeremy's been in touch with Chelsea and Jay recently to see how things had changed since being on the show, they hadn't much. And yes Jeremy it really is a shame. Despite the very best of televisual group therapy and soundbite advice, some people do find it difficult to forget the issues of their past which are periodically broadcast to the nation and move on with their lives. A crying shame.

It's times like this my buddy Timon here says: 'slimy yet satisfying'

Thursday, August 29, 2013

Ruby Tandoh



Just as the wedding season is drawing to a close, the Great British Bake Off season is begining! Hooray and Hurrah and Bally Ho or whatever it is us British say at such times. This is a little off of the Real TV Wisdom rules, being a statement in the first person, but as I'm already a little bit in love with this week's star baker Ruby (I'm not alone according to a quick google) I wanted to draw her and extol the wisdom of this statement, which ran deep with me. Succeeding, not in what you are EXPECTED to succeed in, or even what you are EXPECTED not to, not in what SOCIETY (I'm getting carried away with the caps today sorry) deems success, but in what you find most fun and fulfilling, that's the real icing on the cake isn't it? I could be Sue Perkins.

Wednesday, July 24, 2013

Raymond Blanc


Ah I love cookery television. I know that Pharrell and Mr Thicke have been trying to tell me this real wisdom all summer, but somehow when coming from such a respectable frenchman it carries more weight. Whether applied to the mixing of cordon bleu techniques, the vagaries of appropriate nudity, or the consideration of whether drawing television chefs is a good use of my time, so many lines are indeed blurred. 
And that is, indeed, life. 

Saturday, June 29, 2013

Danni Minogue


It's a thing about drawing people I've found, that you don't really notice how funny looking people are till you draw them. When I do live portraits, I often help put people at their ease and encourage them to feel less self conscious by exclaiming half way through the picture and telling them what unusual nostrils they have, or that their ear lobes are the squarest I've ever seen. Danni Minogue incidentally I noticed, has abnormally small amounts of white showing in her eyes. Honestly, they are like a horse's eyes. She's still beautiful of course. This came after a tragicomic controversy where two wannabe models actively refused to have their hair cut. There's a lesson for anyone with a dream there - compromise is necessary if you're ambitious. I wonder what things Danni did that created the person that she wanted to be. Apart from working with Simon Cowell I mean. 

Tuesday, June 11, 2013

Hayden Panettiere


Hayden has a special place in my heart, from both Heroes and Nashville, but who knew she had so much real wisdom in her? This is very much the shortened version, her speech in full: 
'It's not that we don't have regrets in our lives, or wish that we did things differently, but that the end result is the same. It happened, bad things happen, but you have two choices; to either lay and roll around in it, or take the best message you can from it and take that with you through life, so..'
The context, if you missed TGNS this week (why? do you have a life?) is that she has a tattoo on her back that says 'live without regrets' in Italian. Only it's spelt wrong. Proving it 100% true. 

I may stick this one on my wall to remind me of it's epic wisdom. I especially like the image of Hayden rolling around in bad things. 

Thursday, June 6, 2013

Craig Revel Horwood


If you don't get it, it's a joke because he is a judge on Strictly Come Dancing. I didn't watch that though, I watched The Sarah Millican Television Programme. Which is much funnier.

Tuesday, May 28, 2013

David Dickinson


I couldn't resist drawing this today after spending a frustrating hour trying and failing to buy second class stamps on Upper Street. I know that's not what David was talking about, but it's still wisdom, because really, what IS the same as it used to be? I once met David Dickinson in real life at a university Freshers Ball. I'm not sure I knew who he was but I remember being impressed by his complexion. Which is not done justice here.

Sunday, May 19, 2013

eurovision

I did some live drawing of Eurovision's silliest wisest  lyrics last night which can be seen below. They are not strictly within the rules I set myself for the project. But it was a special occasion. (Eurovision)

I have a long and rich relationship with total Eclipse of the Heart, and a healthy respect for Bonnie Tyler, who was the UK's representative at Eurovision this year. She didn't do very well, but that's not her fault. They hate us Bonnie, not you. 

And it is good to see that she has a healthy respect for mankind's capacity to trust the information provided by the senses. She knows she's not invisible, although she doesn't seem to be interested in the belief of people who have faith in things other than what they can see. Like God. Or atoms. 

Or love. 

I am very interested in Andrius Pojavis' shoes. They sound very important. I don't know why this song didn't do better. I thought it was very wise and insightful. Love and Pain ARE like a pair of shoes. You CAN have one without the other, but you will have at the very least a cold foot.

Tuesday, May 14, 2013

Sir Tom

When do you have two nights in one week? wait that doesn't work. anyway I drew two Knights this week. 

I much prefer Sir Tom Jones. And he is right to raise concerns here at the increasingly terrifying musical crossover trend spreading through popular television. Where will it end I ask you? Where will it end? Michael Buble singing Jay z? One Direction singing Wagner? Actually I would like to see both of those things. 

Wednesday, May 8, 2013

Lord Sugar



Well MasterChef is over, but it's that time of year again when a bunch of strangely confident idiots are recruited to pretend that unusual team building activities have anything to do with their viability as small business investment candidates. Horay!

I got this jewel of wisdom from Sir Alan early in the episode, later he made the announcement 'I like a lot of facts' so I have high hopes for him spouting more TV Wisdom soundbites as the series goes on.

Not quite as hopeful for the contestants, since these people seem to be mostly selected on their ability to only ever make statements which are self referential, as in 'I just feel my effortless superiority will take me all the way' and 'I'm business perfection personified'. Sadly I didn't just recently start a Real TV Boasting project.

Tuesday, May 7, 2013

Alesha Dixon

Always good on reality TV to make a grand positive statement before a crushing put-down. I'm off to do some bad dancing now to enrich my soul.

Thursday, May 2, 2013

Wednesday, May 1, 2013

Will and Danny

Interactional pearls of wisdom from two lovely The Voice judges from last Saturday  Clearly Will has never got the elevator at Warren Street tube tho.

Tuesday, April 30, 2013

Jay Rayner

What more deep a truth than an acknowledgement of the universality of mortality? Jay Rayner of course adds a cynically personal touch, which I cannot believe, i hope to see him again on Masterchef, again with his witty hair and occasional cravat (or am I confusing him with Matt Preston?), what more can we hope for in life Mr Rayner? Surely not exquisitely crafted appetisers?

Monday, April 29, 2013

Anita Manning

This does seem like madness. But apparently applied to vintage stools, it is wisdom. Love her hair.

Ricardo Afonso


I thought this was very true Ricardo, life does take you in certain directions, it took you to Musical theatre, and now it has taken you to team Danny, where will it take you next?

Also - fascinating life point - drawing this I noticed the phenomenon that is if you pin a microphone on the middle of a round collared t-shirt, it can drag it down a little and make it look like a v-neck. I'm sure Ricardo is comfortable in a v-neck, but it's something to bear in mind if you're planning to appear on reality TV and you want to retain the appearance of wearing a round necked t-shirt. I also just realised that you can't really tell this in my drawing, as I corrected it. so never mind.

Irina


Monday, April 22, 2013

First Post Evvvveeerrrrr!

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A new project from Jenny Robins (me) based on two fundamental truths: People are brilliant, drawing from television is brilliant. Because of how it captures the brilliance of people.

TV, like life, is fleeting, we laugh, we cry, we go in the other room to make a cup of tea or read an email and miss stuff. I want to record some of the greater moments and pin them down in the traditional moment capturing method of drawing. Which is better than photographs. Because I say so.

For this project I want to bring you true wisdom from the unscripted mouths of celebrities and reality tv contestants, masterchefs, britains with talent, interviewees and interviewers. But it has to be straight from the head, conversational, as i said - unscripted, ostensibly their words, their brilliance, and their expressions when they said it.

Sometimes there will be cliche, there will be bad grammar (and not just from me) and there will be cringe. But i want you to know it's coming from a loving place.

Here are some previous TV drawings I've done to get the ball rolling

one of my first TV drawings - do you remember Corin from Big Brother 11? I really wish I had started this project when Big Brother was still good. 

These are some drawings of Phillip Schofield. That man has an excellent face. 

These are last year's The Voice finalists, don't know about you kids but i am loving this year's lineup already. 


You can see my other works at places like my websiteillustration blogfacebook projectetsy shopcollective, and you know. other places.